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This is not much better than treating someone like a prostitute and certainly is not an indicator of a man that wants to forge a relationship with you. He doesn’t want to try to get to know your personality.A guy doesn’t need to know what colour knickers you are wearing in order to get to know you. He seems to call only when it’s 1) dark, 2) late and 3) to arrange when to have sex.When a man says this, instead of rationalising and hoping that he will change his mind after the event, don’t and move on. This is Fast Forwarding and it’s often ignored and mistaken for a strong attraction and connection. He’s not into you, he’s into the idea of shagging you.

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If you find yourself being used for sex, an ego stroke, or a shoulder to lean on (or all three), you should read my book Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl. Baggage Reclaim is a guide to learning to live and love with self-esteem by breaking the patterns that stand in your way.

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